GamerTab That was an excellent one.

TeenzTen An action-packed slog

Breakinger A Brilliant Conflict

RipDelight This is a tender, generous movie that likes its characters and presents them as real people, full of flaws and strengths.

sacbrina This is the biggest piece of cinematic trash to have been release since Leonard part 6. Though there is a market for the unknown film makers and their low budget films (and some have been fantastic)this was just ridiculous. The plot was terrible, the acting was terrible, and the amount of money spent on fake penises in this film must have eaten up more than half the entire budget. I will say that the some of the make up was done well. Also the soundtrack was not awful. Unfortunately these are the only strong point of this film. There seemed to be more interest in getting a rise out people with brutal murder scenes and excessive nudity.

monique-snyman How can one begin to review a film that's so vulgar, so politically incorrect and so very… cocky? I've tried to think about how to make this review "reader friendly", but it's been quite a difficult task especially when one gets to watch a sausage fest on your television for the whole duration of the film. I tried to think of some quirky title for the review, but it simply fell short and didn't do the movie justice, so I'll try to be as gentle as possible with this review, but I can't promise that I'll behave.The Taint starts off with… well it starts off with me putting the DVD into the DVD player and seeing an intro of a head surrounded by penises, which by the look of it was very reminiscent of the 80's. Then the movie starts and again, we have a lot of cocks on screen… some getting severed throughout the film, others just ejaculating continuously. Now at first one would think this movie makes no sense apart for being just blood and sex, but one would be wrong… I think. It was quite difficult to find the actual plot in between all the male anatomy, but what I could find was that it's a story about a misogynist that basically hates himself after being forced to perform something rather shocking on his ex-girlfriend, this includes a coat hanger, soap and a condom. However, that's not the main focus of the film. The Taint is about a couple of scientists that discovers a concentrated form of penile fluids that makes the penis larger, for longer. It's basically better than Viagra. However there are side effects to this "miracle cure for males everywhere". These men kind of go crazy after using this concentrated "Viagra", in the sense of, they torture anything wearing a skirt and then gruesomely kills them.Of course, what can we expect from a film that's so low-budget looking, so horribly bad, so… so… Okay, no, I'm sorry, I kind of enjoyed seeing all the penis mutilation and cum shots and yes, I know I'm quite a perverted puppy. I mean, it's freaking hilarious and gross and it's everything a person wants in a bad horror movie! There's this one scene that's so homosexually enticing, that I actually wondered whether or not the directors, Drew Bolduc and Dan Nelson, were closet gays! I loved it!Now, other than that rather prolonged scene of a guy in tight yellow hotpants, we have a lot of blood and gore. Sure, penis mutilation makes any feminist happy (I'm not a feminist, I just enjoy seeing men cringe whenever junior gets cut off), but it's hardly one-sided gore. In other words, you can expect seeing brains, a lot of blood, a few faces being ripped off, and an incredibly funny scene where a poor lady gets sawed in half. To round it all off we have semen, a hell of a lot of semen. There's so much semen present in The Taint that a porn star would blush!The Taint went out to make a bad horror movie that would shock and disturb, it succeeded in both and will surely become a cult classic faster than one could say: "Does anyone have a coat hanger?"If you are smart and enjoy seeing a lot of gore, the disgusting and some male anatomy being cut or shot off, then by all means, be prepared to be disgusted and enthralled by The Taint. It's funny and stupid and goofy and no, it won't win an Oscar. I guess that's what makes it so brilliant in the end.

citizen_toxie With The Taint, it seems clear that Drew Bodluc has conquered the explodingpenisploitation genre. Though clearly inspired by Troma's brand of humor, Bodluc captures a tone that is at different times wacky, emotional, exciting, and above all fresh. With performances that can only be described as "special," the film weaves an interesting story of misogyny gone amok. After a taint in the water turns every man into raving woman killers, Phil O'Ginny (Bodluc) faces the world women being dismembered and killed in a number of ways. The main attraction here, though, is the music. With songs that sound ripped straight out of an Italian slasher movie, The Taint's action scenes are just so joyful to watch. If there was ever a rhythm to penises exploding, Bodluc has found it. It's interesting that this film was made for such a low budget, because it has a very polished feel. Gore effects are gooey, the cinematography has a very cool feel, and the music, again, is phenomenal. Many horror movies these days resort to using the "grindhouse" approach and simply mining the supposed "wackiness" of the films of the 1980s. The Taint, though, proves that there's still originality left in the penis explosion genre.

Coventry "The Taint" is a textbook example of an amateur horror movie made by a bunch of over-enthusiast film fanatics that spent way too much time watching 80's junk in their basements. These are the people who watched stuff like "The Dead Next Door", "Street Trash" and maybe even Peter Jackson's "Bad Taste" over and over again whilst promising each other they would make their own movie like that one day. Basically I don't have anything against this type of Z-grade cinema, but I reckon it's a lot more fun to be part of making the film than to actually watch it. "The Taint" is an unbelievably gross, disgusting and offensive bunch of nonsense. Think about Troma's most notorious titles, but multiply the nausea by ten. Writer/director/lead actor Drew Bolduc obviously suffers from an unhealthy obsession for the male reproductive organ. There's an immeasurable amount of fake penises in this film, mostly just hanging out of people's pants or squirting thick white goo into other people's faces. For you see, the water supply is contaminated and turns all the men into zombie-like misogynist monsters with only one remaining purpose in life: smash in the head of every woman that crosses their path. The taint was initially a miracle potion developed by two nerdy scientists who wanted to enlarge their own penis, but a few things went wrong. One of the last remaining uninfected males is high-school stoner Phil O'Ginny, but he needs the help of dominant battle-ax Misandra to survive. Drew Bolduc and his buddies tried really hard to put as many provocative themes into their film. There's scat, teenage abortion with a coat hanger, gang rape, Nazi propaganda and various other filth. The images are never shocking, though, since the whole thing is just too ludicrous. Unfortunately the vast majority of the film is dull and stupid, especially since all characters (even the most insignificant supportive ones) insist on telling their boring life stories during idiotic and irrelevant flashbacks. Strangely – and surprisingly - enough, "The Taint" isn't all too awful from a more technical point of view. With this type of amateur junk, I expect to see dodgy hand-held camera-work and lousy hyperactive editing, but this one is relatively well-made and decent. The acting performances are horrendous, but that's obligatory and part of the charm. The gore and splatter effects, on the other hand, are quite stupendous! I presume 99% of the non- existent budget went straight to fake blood and make-up. With all the computer engineered crap nowadays, the grossness in "The Taint" was more than praiseworthy. Avid fans of trash and schlock will have a great time tracking down this sick puppy. Personally, I thought it was okay, but it could have used less idiocy and a lot less penises.