Greenes Please don't spend money on this.

KnotStronger This is a must-see and one of the best documentaries - and films - of this year.

FirstWitch A movie that not only functions as a solid scarefest but a razor-sharp satire.

Raymond Sierra The film may be flawed, but its message is not.

Woodyanders A strangely affable piece of fluffy-headed 70's drive-in comedic piffle which lazily coasts along on the faintest whiff of a plot. The story as far as it goes centers on a spacey solar-powered futuristic supervan equipped with lasers and a plush interior created by your standard flaky inventor (amiable nerd Tom Kindle). Evil corporate head T.B. Trenton (white-haired perennial bad guy thespian Morgan Woodard doing his patented so-slimy-he-slides-when-he-walks villainous bit) wants the supervan for himself so he can win a big annual van contest. Starry-eyed working class zhlub dreamer Morgan the Pirate (impish Mark Schneider) makes off with both the supervan and Trenton's rebellious teen daughter Karen (cute, spunky, buxom brunette Katie Saylor). The expected wacky comic hi-jinks and crazy, careening slapstick car chases ensue.Sure, the admittedly skimpy story ain't much and the loosey-goosey pace meanders all over the place, but what this mama lacks in intricate and sophisticated narrative substance (plenty, to be brutally honest) it surely compensates for in giddy, good-natured, just-give-the-audience-what-they've-paid-to-see eager to please stupidity. For instance, there's a totally gratuitous, but still welcome wet t-shirt contest. Moreover, a nearly endless barrage of funky-throbbing disco songs about vans and van culture blares away on the soundtrack throughout. Irv Goodnoff's pretty, hazy, sunshine-soaked cinematography boasts a few fine sinuous tracking shots and radiates a distinctly 70's warm'n'fuzzy glow (coincidentally, Goodnoff also shot the equally asinine, but still awesome "The Van"!). Blustery custom car king George Barris puts in a guest appearance and a sweetly mellow laid-back vibe permeates the entire feature. Why, we even got slack direction from Lamar Card, a sappy romantic sub-plot, lots of filler footage of the van contest, so-loving-they're-downright-fetishistic close-ups of resplendently tacky van decals, dated CB lingo ("We're doin' it to it"), a gang of hostile bikers, a jailbreak, delightfully politically incorrect comic relief lisping homosexuals, and absolutely no pretense to get in the way of the enjoyably goofy'n'silly fun.

BigBadB Well, what to say? The first time I saw it, I think I was completely speechless. And I think I still am, actually. Man, this sux! BigTime! Horrid story, crappy craftsmanship, etc.I am not eve sure that it's a good turkey. But a turkey it is, most certainly! I rated a 10 to it, because I really think people should see it to se how it's NOT supposed to be done!

just_beth For someone outside the realm of vanning I could see how this movie could be confusing or even irritating, however, being a vanner I feel that this movie is a great portrayal of the vanning movement and all that it entails. Vandora, the Supervan, is excessive and borderline ridiculous, but that is what custom vans are all about. The documentation and on-location filming alone make this movie a classic. 2% Vanners Forever!!

Wiley Wiggins Have you ever read a trade journal? One of those magazines meant expressly for plumbers or welders and never intended for the general public? Full of weird lingo and with content so intensely fixed that it becomes almost comedic? This movie is a little like that. Made in the 1970's with a modest budget, this stinker is entirely about CUSTOM VAN CULTURE. Airbrushed unicorns, feathered hair, racing stripes, CB radios. And don't think for a moment that this is some kind of quirky, ironic documentary. It's a really bad narrative piece of fiction. There's sort of a plot. I think somebody has to win a van contest or something similarly morbid. There's a wacky professor that designs a van that shoots lasers for some reason. The soundtrack is all 70's soft rock about Vans. The ridiculousness of the whole thing shoots through the roof when Charles Bukowski wanders drunkenly through a party scene wearing a shirt that says "Water boy for the wet T-shirt contest" (maybe they lured extras by advertising free beer). Whoah man, this movie is so bad it feels like getting clubbed repeatedly with a dead howler monkey just trying to watch it. Of course, if you can stand it, and if you are a connoisseur of bad films, this one is pretty funny in its patheticness.