Platicsco
Good story, Not enough for a whole film
Glucedee
It's hard to see any effort in the film. There's no comedy to speak of, no real drama and, worst of all.
AnhartLinkin
This story has more twists and turns than a second-rate soap opera.
Gurlyndrobb
While it doesn't offer any answers, it both thrills and makes you think.
slimfan
Antonio Sabato, Jr. is possibly the worst actor of his generation. And his acting "skills" are put to good use in this terrible adaptation of the beloved Edgar Rice Burroughs novel, "A Princess of Mars." Obviously bad acting, with a cast of the worst Soap Opera actors and middle-age porn stars money can rent, special effects that were done on a TRS-80, and Martian masks that your 3rd grader made in art class.Yes, it's terrible. On the other hand, some people like terrible movies, and Asylum must be doing something right because they're still in business. My auntie thinks the Sharknado films are hilarious, and, if nothing else, their films do keep terrible actors like Sabato from turning to gay porn, and former porn actresses from ending up in legit movies. AND, I guess Asylum does give would-be directors a chance to recognize they're not cut out to direct, so there's that, too. So, if you have no expectations, and laughing along with terrible movies is your thing, who am I to discourage you?
Paul Magne Haakonsen
Clearly "Princess of Mars" is The Asylum's cash in on the "John Carter" movie that was out in March 2009, as "Princess of Mars" came out in December of the very same year. Is that a trademark of The Asylum, to take something that others made famous and then just sponge and leech of that success?At any rate, and regarding the motivation behind this movie, then The Asylum actually managed to pull of a fairly decent movie here, compared to some of the other more questionable releases they have spewed out.The story, if you are familiar with either the "John Carter" movie or the E.R. Burroughs novel, is about John Carter, a man from Earth, who end up on a distant red planet, where he have to save their world from impending doom.Pretty straight off the copy and paste storyboard here, without anything new or overly interesting to be added to the story. But still, the movie was enjoyable for what it was. A word of warning though; if you have seen the "John Carter" movie that was out earlier in 2009, then chances are that you might want to stay clear of this version. Imagine a weird hybrid of the 1980's "Flash Gordon" movie mixed with Disney's "John Carter" movie, and you have the end result coming out as "Princess of Mars".One thing that did puzzle me, though, with the technology and resources available to the human-like race on this red planet, why would their princess be clad so scantily like a common... Well, you get my meaning. It just didn't make sense. Or did it? Well, you have Traci Lords in the role as the princess, so of course, why wouldn't the director be having her running around half naked?The creature effects were adequate to look at, except for those bipedal reptiles that they used for mounts. They were just horrible to look at. Awfully animated CGI and they walked like they all had bad indigestion.I will say that The Asylum did put out a fairly enjoyable Sci-Fi movie here, but in the wake of Disney's "John Carter", then the movie pales in comparison.
Robert Lent
This movie stumbles badly right away. There's no real need to update it, it works better if it isn't updated. But that's not the real failing. The scene where he is in the hospital being told by some mad scientists that he is being sent to Mars as some sort of science experiment was one of the most absurd that I have ever seen. It was unintentionally comic. Why in the world did they need to declare that Barsoom isn't Mars, but a planet in another solar system? Yes, we know that the real Mars isn't like the Mars that Burroughs imagined, that doesn't interfere with the story.There is a scene were he asks for something to drink, and he is given a rag full of sweat. Another scene where he asks for food, and he is given the excretion of some larva. Neither of these are in the book; they eat something that seems like cheese or tofu, and to drink, they drink the liquid of a cactus-like plant. Why they chose to make this change is beyond me. It seemed to be an attempt to disgust the audience, and didn't make the movie any better.A good Phantom Edit would cut out entirely the portion before he gets to Mars. A minute of two of narration at the beginning could replace the entire first part of the movie. It would also be necessary to snip out the part where you learn the bad guy is from Earth. You don't have to eliminate him entirely, just the nonsense of him being from Earth.I'd also delete the scenes where he is given sweat and larval excretions to drink.Other parts are more minor. Traci Lords is a bit too old, too clothed and too blonde to be a plausible Deja Thoris. She seems more a cranky sitcom mom than a princess of Helium. The tattoos on John Carter seem unlikely, a tramp stamp on a man? But these are minor, the major flaws of this movie are overwhelming, but if they were cut out, this would be, well, not a great movie, but not too bad.If you watch the movie, you see that throughout the movie, one of Tars Tarkas' tusks wobbles. A fairly minor thing, but it shows how quickly they made this movie was made.
Tyrssen-282-277645
It never ceases to amaze me that SyFy can produce so many made-for-TV movies that are incredibly bad. Sometimes it's budget, sometimes it's actors, sometimes it's directors, sometimes it's editing. In this case: all of the above.Traci Lords may have been a porno superstar, but she should have stayed there; in this film, she proves once and for all that she's no actress. Antonio looks good, but is even worse as an actor than Brendan Fraser, "the lantern-jawed oaf."Anyone who's read Burroughs knows that Tharks have four arms, and stand consieerably taller than humans. Hopefully, the new "John Carter" film will get it right; a combination of live action and CG is what's needed here. Make-up and special effects in this one weren't completely bad, but won't win any awards, either. The plot remains oddly disjointed, and this isn't helped by the confusing direction.A great story from a great writer, this one had potential but threw it all away. Not worth nine cents, much less nine bucks.