VividSimon Simply Perfect

GazerRise Fantastic!

Marva It is an exhilarating, distressing, funny and profound film, with one of the more memorable film scores in years,

Fleur Actress is magnificent and exudes a hypnotic screen presence in this affecting drama.

Woodyanders Stop me if you've already heard this one before: A group of friends trespass on private property so they can gain access a hard to find nature trail. Naturally, they find themselves deep in the remote woods with a ferocious redneck killer (hulking Larry Laliberte) who doesn't take kindly to any strangers on his land.While writer/director Richard Swindell delivers a few effectively wince-inducing moments of nasty and gruesome violence and deserves some praise for giving this film a strong and unwavering nihilistic streak, he alas crucially fails to offer a single remotely likable or sympathetic character; instead each and every last person present herein is so incredibly annoying and unappealing that one quite simply doesn't care if any of these insufferably obnoxious jerks lives or dies, which in turn completely negates any tension this picture needs to really work. Moreover, the hackneyed pain-by-the-numbers script not only suffers from an appalling excess of tin-eared profane dialogue, but also doesn't do anything fresh or inspired with the trite premise (for example, it's pretty obvious the token black guy isn't going to survive). And while the gals are hot, there's unfortunately no gratuitous female nudity to compensate for this picture's glaring weaknesses. On the plus side, Jeff Samuelson's sharp cinematography makes neat occasional use of dissolves and overhead camera angles and the capable cast do their best with the shoddy material. But overall this one sizes up as a real clunker.

FilmFatale There are some decent "killer redneck" movies, and even some that are bad enough to be fun. However, I didn't find any reason for Pelt to exist. The first problem, as many have mentioned, is that the seven main characters (three crude hot chicks and four crude bros) are completely unlikable in their establishing scenes. They are rude and horrible to every single person that crosses their respective paths. Therefore, we don't care whether they live or die - we actively want to see all of them get taken out. Which brings me to my second problem with Pelt - we don't get to see them taken out. Most of the kills take place just out of camera range, so after taking the time to set these characters up as the worst people on earth and making us suffer through spending time with them, we are denied our money shots - heck, even a nice close up of the aftermaths would be better than nothing. Finally, I am told that Pelt is supposed to be a horror comedy but the big problem with that is it's not funny. It's terrible, and there are times you can't do anything but laugh at what's happening on the screen, but there's a difference between laughing at and laughing with. There's plenty of stupid behavior and bad dialogue, but the whole thing is so inept that it's hard to tell what's awful for laughs and what's just poor script/performance/direction. It also fails as parody because it doesn't seem to have enough understanding of the slasher subgenre to effectively spoof it. I did feel generous enough to give Pelt a 2 instead of a 1 solely because of how the most horrid female character dies and for the zip-up onesie rubber ducky pajamas one character wears through most of the movie. There are many movies out there worse than Pelt, but that doesn't make Pelt worth sitting through.

dreamerlives It's a clichéd one star movie but I'll give it two because of Amber Bollinger. She's hot and runs around in her panties in the woods. Now for the bad. The characters are so annoying you want them all to die. The plot has been done a million times before (see "Wrong Turn" for one example.) My only hope is that the writer and director never make another movie again. In fact, they should be ashamed of themselves for not having an original thought in their collective imaginations. It's rare you get a chance to make a film, so why give the world a boring retread? On the other hand, Amber Bollinger needs to make many more movies. She reminds me of a young Bobbie Phillips. Unfortunately, her character in this film is so annoying that no one other than a few pervy fanboys will remember her.

Boloxxxi Does my summary sound familiar? It should, since this is the basis for many horror films we've seen; some of this ilk better than others. I'm happy to report that this is one of the better ones. You'll get lot's of smiles, a few chuckles, and maybe one or two out right laughs. Add to that an utterance or two of "gross", a surprise ending, and you're good to go. Note: Best viewed by leaving your thinking cap at home (as if you didn't know).Seven young people set out on some quest to a site located in some out-of-the-way place in the wilderness somewhere via a rarely used route (Don't ever do that folks). The seven are: Three cute cockteasers whose only talent, I'm guessing, is skillfully applying make-up and locating items on sale at clothing stores to cocktease in. As for the four young men, I have names for them which should be indicative enough. I call one "Beer" (likes to say the word and never seems completely sober). Another I call "Screwloose". Here's a sampling: In the movie this guy pours beer on the seat of a chair freshly vacated by one of the afore mentioned cuties and laps it up. Then there's "Farts". Need I say more? I don't think so; --but I will. After he does his thing he uses his hands to waft it your way (Just the messenger folks, don't hate me). Then there's, well, "The Black Guy". I call him that because he's the most normal of the guys and so nothing much distinguishes him but that. Although I will say that when you see what this guy sleeps in you may well deduce that he has issues himself, only not as obvious as the others.Having left their vehicles behind at a certain point in their journey, the young people don back-packs and begin their hike thru the woods. Screwloose finds a "No Trespassing" sign but hides it from the others with the help of The Black Guy. Eventually they set up camp and later one couple get it into their heads to go off into the night somewhere to make out (All I can say here is that in these type of movies it must be nature's way of weeding out the stupid; cruel but effective).I think of this movie as a comedy-horror since REAL injury and distress is coupled with the silly banter, utterances and antics of the young people. The movie is called Pelt because there is a very sick freak out there with a thing for butchering and human skin. That I liked this movie surprised the hell out of me!! I always have low expectations when going to see these type of films. Possibly you too, I don't know. Anyway I think you'll like it. Nice mix of humor and violence. Love, Boloxxxi.