Beanbioca As Good As It Gets

AnhartLinkin This story has more twists and turns than a second-rate soap opera.

Donald Seymour This is one of the best movies I’ve seen in a very long time. You have to go and see this on the big screen.

Tobias Burrows It's easily one of the freshest, sharpest and most enjoyable films of this year.

BA_Harrison Having already ripped off The Exorcist with his pretty dreadful 1974 movie The Antichrist, director Alberto De Martino has a bash at copying one of the other major horror successes of the '70s, The Omen—and he does a slightly better job this time around.The decent cast certainly helps: Kirk Douglas stars as industrialist Robert Caine, who slowly comes to realise that his plans for a nuclear power plant in the third world might lead to the Apocalypse, as prophecised in the Bible; Simon Ward is his son Angel, who is determined to see the project to completion at whatever the cost; the lovely Agostina Belli plays Sara Golan, Robert's love interest, whose unborn child may or may not be The Antichrist; and Anthony Quayle appears as scientist Dr. Griffith, who unravels the truth but pays for his discovery with his life.With such solid performers at his disposal, De Martino is able to deliver an entertaining slice of horror hokum despite the script's somewhat talky nature, its preachy anti-nuclear message and more than a few implausible plot turns, with the film's highlights being the juicy decapitation of a political leader by helicopter blade, beautiful Belli getting nekkid for a raunchy romp with ageing Kirk (such a coupling might sound unlikely, but if Michael can get it on with Zeta Jones in real life, then why not?), Caine's trippy dream sequence (which delivers the truly horrific sight of a naked Kirk Douglas), and a chilling scene where a room full of newborn babies are accidentally poisoned by a negligent nurse.6.5 rounded up to 7 for IMDb.

Spikeopath Holocaust 2000 is directed by Alberto De Martino and co-written by Martino and Sergio Donati. It stars Kirk Douglas, Simon Ward, Agostina Belli, Anthony Quayle and Virginia McKenna. Music is by Ennio Morricone and cinematography by Erico Menczer.Nuclear industrialist Robert Caine (Douglas) refuses to heed warnings that the Antichrist is closer to home than he ever could have imagined...Caine and AngelCasting aside the fact that it is a cash in on the success of the far superior The Omen, it simply isn't smart or good enough to make its own mark. Knowing what is going on in the first instance is not a great thing for the audience, it would be were the narrative strong enough to keep us on our toes, but it never is. The plot speeds along merrily following the same trajectory as expected; mysterious deaths, pregnancy, loads of ominous warnings, repeat sequence of doom and on to the unsubtle reveal in preparation for a less than satisfying ending.The makers do try to add some salt to the satanic broth, such as having Douglas roam around naked in a feverish nightmare, and some moments are kinda fun in that tacky Italian/England production way, but the zip, the originality, is sorely lacking. Cast seem to be working off of a different screenplay to each other, though Douglas is at least working hard to make the duff regurgitation come alive. It looks nice on occasions, and it's fun for the wrong reasons, but its low standing reputation is fully justified and therefore near impossible to recommend to anyone but Kirk Douglas completists. 5/10

Jonathon Dabell Holocaust 2000 represents two things. It is the director's attempt to cash in on the huge success of The Omen. It is also Kirk Douglas's attempt to get a wider, younger audience back on his side by flirting with the horror genre.The film is a mess, with Douglas playing the unsuspecting father whose business plans for a thermonuclear plant in the Middle East are enormously unpopular. His son, Simon Ward (a real Michael Caine lookalike in this film), is his closest ally when it comes to trying to build the plant, but what Douglas hasn't figured out is that his son is the embodiment of the AntiChrist, and that he only wants it built so that he can destroy mankind. Various people get killed (especially anyone who stands in the way of the plot) before Douglas figures it all out, but by then everyone thinks he is mad and he can't stop the completion of the plant. However, he does manage to escape and thus lives to fight another day.The film never pushes the audience out of their comfort zone. It poses no thought provoking questions, no ominous atmosphere, and no originality. The performances are surprisingly good considering that the material is so poor. A couple of the killings are well filmed, especially the colonel who is beheaded by a helicopter rotor blade, but some of them are a bit unconvincing. The film's one sex scene is quite erotic (surprisingly so considering the age gap between Douglas and his co-star Agostina Belli) but that hardly makes it worth watching. All in all, this is a missed opportunity.

emm The end is near! Citizens protest! Worldwide panic spreads across the globe! A nuclear holocaust threatens us all! The monstrous beast will rise from the ocean to consume all life! Earth will become a scorched wasteland!Who ought to care about why the hell this movie punctuates so much on the Apocalypse? The Italians certainly had been ashamed of making this film in the first place! Even our priests who run the churches would be in for a mass uproar about the falsity this delivers. But heck, this is the movies!Words cannot describe this sordid, terrible drama, acting more of a drunken Shakespearean play about nuclear fear than anything else. A poor planning in developing a good story and lousy writing makes this the perfect glass of sour milk. One of our best well-known movie stars, Kirk Douglas, has a few embarrassing performances, one of which is when he stands out naked in front of visions of rising monsters from the ocean. Also, it makes a failed attempt at showing off any suspenseful magic about the supernatural. Either it is Douglas who thinks the Great Flood has come, or just a coincidence of Mother Nature rising the ocean tide.The movie actually gets a further beating on trying to be a meaningless horror / splatter film, which wants to show off uselessly. HOLOCAUST 2000 is good if you want to see Kirk Douglas star in a movie so horrifying in its pitiful execution and directing skills. What does this movie want to be when it fouls up? A DOOMSDAY BOMB!