ThiefHott Too much of everything

FeistyUpper If you don't like this, we can't be friends.

ChanFamous I wanted to like it more than I actually did... But much of the humor totally escaped me and I walked out only mildly impressed.

Gary The movie's not perfect, but it sticks the landing of its message. It was engaging - thrilling at times - and I personally thought it was a great time.

Sam Panico Sure, Jess Franco is just making a new version of The Awful Dr. Orloff with this film, but with bigger stars and plenty of gore. And when you're looking for a movie to watch at 4 AM - and I often am - it certainly does the trick.Dr. Frank Flamand (Helmut Berger, The Damned) is a plastic surgeon surrounded by gorgeous women who walk arm in arm to his fancy car. But a former patient wants revenge, so she tosses acid at him. Instead, she catches his sister, Ingrid, directly in the face, ruining her gorgeous looks.Fast forward to a modeling shoot in Paris, where Flamand's assistant Nathalie (Brigitte Lahaie, The Grapes of Death) drugs and abducts Barbara Hallen (Caroline Munro, Captain Kronos - Vampire Hunter, Dr. Phibes Rises Again). As she locks her into the basement of the doctor's clinic, Nathalie gets into an argument with Gordon, a maniac who lives down in the basement and chops off women's arms for a hobby.Still with us? Then let's go to New York, where Barbara's dad Terry (Telly Savalas, Lisa and the Devil) is searching for his daughter, turning to Sam Morgan (Chris Mitchum, Alejandro Jodorowsky's Tusk, Bigfoot, Chisum) to help find her. He first travels to a Paris morgue, where her body supposedly is, but the headless victim is not her as its missing a mole.Flamand and his sister meet Dr. Orloff (Howard Vernon, who played Orloff in six of his seven films) and learn how they can cut off Barbara's face to replace Ingrid's thanks to a Nazi scientist named Dr. Karl Heinz Moser (Anton Diffring, who played numerous Nazis in his career, including in Jerry Lewis' long lost The Day the Clown Cried). Plus, Franco's longtime muse, Lina Romay, appears here as Orloff's wife. When the doctor returns to his office, he learns Gordon has cut up Barbara's face.Morgan beats up Barabra's photo director before a bouncer makes him leave. He has to call Terry with some bad news - his daughter had been working as a prostitute.The doctor finds another face donor for the surgery, but Moser destroys it. That means they need to find yet another victim, during which Barbara's credit card is traced to Flamand's clinic. Morgan starts surveillance and notices that Nathalie is wearing Barbara's clothes.He arrives at the clinic and takes out Gordon, but is overcome and locked into the cell with all of the girls. The villains leave them bricked up and with their air running out. But Sam has sent Barbara's dad a message, who gets ready to rescue everyone. And then...the movie ends.Yep.The original ending of the film had Sam saving the day, but Franco wanting to make it different and leave it open as to whether Sam and Barabara survived. Why? Why ask.Oh yeah - I almost forgot. This film is replete with surgical horror, like faces being sliced and lifted off, needles into eyeballs, scissors into throats and much, much more. If only it lived up to the promise of its poster, but that said, it's grimy and seedy fun if you can't find anything else.

chrisbridges71 I recently finished watching the first season of Kojak which Universal released. With Telly Savalis fresh on my mind, I decided to buy this movie since he had a role in it.Immediately, it is evident that Franco had a bigger budget to work with. Combined with a better-than-usual script for one his movies and some acting talent (look for John Vernon from Zombie Lake is a brief role), and this movie was not bad.By this time, this genre of movie had started to fade away in terms of quality releases. Lucio Fulci had run out of steam by this point as had Umberto Lenzi. Even the great Ruggero Deodato was struggling having just released Body Count the year before. (Unlike Franco's "Faceless," Body County had some known actors but the script was terrible and they had nothing to work with.)It was interesting to see Savalis in this, even though he was not a main character. His bald head, distinct voice and flashy suit, just like from his days as Kojak, added to the movie. His small role could not have saved this movie if it was terrible. However, in this case he added to it and made it a decent effort from a director who is routinely criticized for his work.I would recommend giving this a look.

capkronos I readily admit that I am not a Jesus Franco fan, especially after sitting through such mind-numbing drivel as OASIS OF THE ZOMBIES, REVENGE IN THE HOUSE OF USHER and MARI-COOKIE AND THE KILLER TARANTULA. However, he did make a handful of OK genre films that, while wildly uneven, at least managed to merge the director's excesses to create an entertaining film. While FACELESS has myriad production woes (loopy plotting, big holes in the story, a very out-of-place/silly pop tune that is repeated about twenty times...), it is surprisingly good in other areas; particularly the excellent casting, the professional photography, the high production values (René Château produced and it was released through his own company), the location work in and around Paris, the fittingly gruesome make-up effects and some effective sick/trashy passages. By dropping the empty pretension that plagues much of his other work, Franco basically gives the intended audience a more straight-forward horror story sparked by exploitation elements hearkening back to Euro-trash cinema of the past, notably to the 1959 classic EYES WITHOUT A FACE and Franco's own AWFUL DR. ORLOFF (1961).Crazed Parisian plastic surgeon Frank Flamand (Helmut Berger, who played the title role in DORIAN GRAY back in 1970) wants to restore the beauty of his distraught, slightly disturbed, facially-scarred sister Ingrid (Christiane Jean), who had acid thrown in her face by one of his disgruntled former patients. His clinic is not only a place to work on wealthy older women (including acclaimed French actress Stephane Audran of all people!), but also (in a hidden wing of the hospital) a place to keep beautiful young ladies prisoner in padded cells. He plans on removing their faces and transplanting them onto Ingrid once he gets the technique down. Aiding him is his icy blonde nurse/lover Nathalie (former Euro porn queen Brigitte Lahaie), a hulking, perverted, semi retarded behemoth with shaved-off eyebrows named Gordon (Gérard Zalcberg) and Dr. Orloff (Howard Vernon, only in one scene), who sends him some help in the form of Nazi war criminal/doctor Dr. Karl Heinz Moser (Anton Diffring), who had previously caught fire experimenting on full face transplants. Meanwhile, New York City detective Sam Morgan (Christopher Mitchum) is on the case after Terry Hallen (Telly Savalas!) hires him to find his missing, troublesome, pampered, drug-addicted model daughter Barbara (Caroline Munro). Guess where she disappeared to?There's plenty of all-around sleaze to keep trash movie fans glued to the screen... Rape, heavily implied incest, voyeurism, necrophilia, threesomes, male gigolos, lesbians, a flamboyant fashion designer, bad disco dancing, decapitation by chainsaw, a needle piercing an eyeball in close-up, two full face scalpings (one of which is extremely messy!), scissors stuck in a neck and much more. Interestingly (and surprisingly) in the uncut version I saw, there is almost no nudity. It was shot in English, with only some of the supporting actors dubbed. The ending was unexpected and right out of Poe. And like I mentioned before, the cast is excellent.It's hard to imagine a classier and more sophisticated couple of sick-o's than Berger and Lahaie. Both look great cruising the club scene for victims, engaging in kinky scenarios and lashing out violently at victims in the calmest, coolest fashion imaginable. I was particularly impressed with Lahaie. Of course she looks gorgeous (and naturally gorgeous, at that), but she also has great presence as a villainess. She is dubbed in this film, but it's easy to see why she has received mainstream work along with the sex films. Diffring (who has the most incredible pair of eyes in show business) adds his usual stamp of class and a much needed injection of credibility to his final role; a virtual replay of his famous CIRCUS OF HORRORS character. Even though he has nothing to do but sit behind a desk, Savalas is the consummate professional and doesn't embarrass himself. Neither does Munro, who spends most of her scenes in a cell trying to fend off Gordon and gets to show more emotion than usual. The only bad performance out of the principles is Mitchum, who is dull and one-note throughout. Florence Guerin (in an in-joke appearance as herself) and Lina Romay as Mrs. Orloff (she has one line of dialogue) are also here, albeit briefly. The DVD has very good interviews with Franco, Munro and Mitchum, audio commentary from Franco and Romay, partial audio commentary from Mitchum and some trailers.

Macholic *MINOR SPOILERS*This one has a healthier budget than most Franco has made, decent production values and actors. Here Franco rips off George Franju's Eyes Without A Face: People loose their faceskin in gory details and are subsequently disposed of. There is a particulary grim and delicious decapitation with chainsaw, this is truly a gorehounds delight and in between the bloodletting feast your eyes on Brigitte Lahie and Caroline Munro. The Horrible Secret of Dr. Hichcock is still Franco's best, but for less subtle fair Faceless is doing nicely. 6/10