Unlimitedia Sick Product of a Sick System

Lawbolisted Powerful

Console best movie i've ever seen.

Francene Odetta It's simply great fun, a winsome film and an occasionally over-the-top luxury fantasy that never flags.

Michael Ledo This is a film that showed early promise, was a great idea, but the actors, dialogue, and plot couldn't bring it on. The film starts out as a reality film as they watch and interview a cheerleader. When she is killed while performing "America's most dangerous sport" her friend Maddy (Caitlin Stasey) takes her spot with the intent of enacting revenge especially on football player Terry (Tom Williamson). Added to this mix is witch Leena (Sianoa Smit-McPhee) who makes things happen with stones and crystals that act like a Monkey's Paw.The film takes 30 minutes to develop. It was good getting there. Once we entered into the meat of the film, the writers didn't know what to do. Or at least they didn't do it well. Character build up was mostly ineffective.Asylum production. Okay as an inexpensive rental.Parental Guide: F-bomb. Sex. Rape. Nudity (Reanin Johannink- or body double Mallory Thompson)

Prismark10 This is a poor remake with poor production values. It almost looks amateurish.Some High School cheerleaders get attacked one night by the High School Jocks and end up driving into the river.Lucky for them a girl at the High School and also a friendly, neighbourhood witch revives them and they have unusual powers such as a lust for blood. Not sure how these girls have got a vampire type blood-lust.The girls ineptly plan revenge on the boys who attacked them but the alpha male, who is the most sadistic and vile figures out that these cheerleaders have special powers and he is hell bent on acquiring them.The film has a great deal of uneven tone. A typical High School comedy about the beautiful people, bitchiness to bullying and the worse kind of cruel, male bullying. It varies wildly unsure whether it wants to be a black horror comedy, campy silliness to supernatural, or just plain cruel.

TdSmth5 Some girl who doesn't like cheerleaders is filming some documentary about them, following the main cheerleader around. That one is one bitchy chick, who dies a hilarious death while showing off on video during practice. So what does Maddy, the cheerleader-hating girl do? Audition for dead girl's place.Also following them around is a wiccan chick. And of course you've got to have the football players, one uglier and more obnoxious than the other. Maddy gets the now-main cheerleader, Tracy, to think that her guy, one of the football players, is cheating on her. She insults him via text. He doesn't understand but gets angry. During some evening soiree out in the woods, the girls are hanging out in one area, the guys in another. Maddy seduces Tracy who when she sees her guy attacks him verbally. He punches her brutally. When the girls leave in their car they fall down a cliff and die. The wicking girl resurrects them with her magic crystals which embed themselves into each of the girls. And indeed, they come back to life. In the case of two sisters though they awaken in the other's body.Quickly they realize that they need human blood to survive and that they are somehow connected. When one of them lusts or hungers, the others feel it too. Of course they will have to take revenge on the guys who are stunned to see them walk around school when they saw them die the night before. But it won't be easy as the woman-brutalizer who apparently owns the football team even though he isn't the quarterback, figures out what is going on and uses that knowledge to his advantage.Lucky McKee continues his quest to show Hollywood that he's the most feminist filmmaker of feminist filmmakers. Aside from the standard obnoxious demonization of men, or in this case, boys, All Cheerleaders Die is a well-done and somewhat original supernatural horror movie. Of course a movie like this depends entirely on the girls, and Caitlin Stasey and Brooke Butler make it work. The lovely Amanda Grace Cooper is a revelation. What doesn't work though is some of the male cast and characters starting with the atrocious villain. I also would have preferred a different actress to play the witch. You know, witches can be hot, too. They don't all have to look weird and creepy. A more serious problem though is that you have a campy movie about cheerleaders but with almost no nudity. At least there's some kissing among the girls. Also annoying is the push to try and sell us a soundtrack CD by constantly adding some completely out of place music that rarely fits the scene. Still, I enjoyed this movie and look forward to sequels.

chow913 Cheerleaders, zombies, and vampires? Could be fun. But it's NOT!!!Why does this film have such a high rating on IMDb? Because once again the studio has trolled this site with fake reviews and IMDb doesn't stop them! I just finished watching a critical analysis of 'Who's That Girl' and we did find a few funny gags to its credit. 'All Cheerleaders Die' has NO redeeming credits at all!!! That's how bad this film is. I enjoyed more or rather hated less 'Who's That Girl' than this film.The plot: I watched this film twice just to make sure I can honestly say this film has NO plot what so ever! That's how bad it is! Even after a second viewing I still cannot name a single character in this film! Alright, here's what happens: It opens with a bio video about a snobby slutty dumb Mulatto cheerleader. It never explains whom she's speaking to or why she's breaking the 4th wall she just talk to the camera. No, the school newspaper isn't doing a story on her she's just talking to the camera for no reason for the first five minutes of the film until she dies by breaking her neck. This character's life nor death serves no purpose to the rest of the film it's just the opening five minutes, this is one of these films where things just happen for no reason! Next a goth girl is dumped by her friend? Since it's NEVER explained who any of these characters are I presume they're friends?While out drinking in the woods they get into a verbal and then physical fight with the football team. Isn't the point of slutty cheerleaders and dumb jocks getting drunk in the woods to have sex? Not beat each other up? Anyway a car chase ensues and the cheerleaders are all drowned. The goth girl just happens along and is able to drag five 100 pound bodies back into the woods where she performs a Wicken spell which brings them back to life.The girls return to the goth girl's house where one of the characters is upset because her soul is in her sister's body. Again, since it's NEVER explained whom any of these characters are we don't know whom her sister is nor do we care. Although we do wonder, if there was a soul body mix up, wouldn't there be a second sister also upset about being in her sister's body? Well there isn't.The girls are apparently now cold fleshed zombies. Although if they have their souls back why are they zombies? Aren't zombies living bodies without souls? Whatever, let's just wrap this up, we're already 75% into the movie! No kidding! It takes over an hour just to get to the narrative hook. But this isn't 'Ben-Hur' it's still only 90 minutes. See? There is a God.The girls first eat a neighbor alive and then go back to school to kill some boys. Are these the same boys who caused the fatal car accident? We don't know! It's NEVER explained who any of these characters are!The token black quarterback shows back up. Yes, him we remember. He's the only black guy in this movie. He caused the accident. They kill him. The end. I didn't leave out a single detail. That's it! There is not a single interesting element in this whole film! There is nothing sexy, scary, or exciting. It isn't even entertaining on a base level like 'Sharknadeo.' If this and 'Who's That Girl?' are the only two films on TV, gauge your eyes out! No, seriously watch 'Who's That Girl?' This is just how bad 'All Cheerleaders Die' is!